Chapter Text
The cutting drone of Gary’s meow awoke the sponge, replacing his usual alarm.
“Meow! Meow! Meooow!”
“Gary, what is it?” SpongeBob groaned, rubbing his eyes.
The snail aggressively pointed an eyestalk to his empty food bowl.
SpongeBob jumped from the sofa, scrambling to find Gary’s food. “Dear Neptune! I forgot to feed you Gare, I’m so sorry! Please forgive me!” he said, shaking out the kibble frantically.
Gary slithered towards the bowl, giving SpongeBob a look of displeasure before digging in. SpongeBob gently stroked his shell, murmuring apologies.
Once confident that Gary was content, he stepped away into the kitchen to gather himself. His thoughts immediately drifted to Squidward. If he hadn’t been so tired last night, he surely would have checked on him.
Should I go over there? Should I call? What if he’s… dead?
Stricken by fear at the thought of discovering a lifeless corpse, he decided to call first. Reaching for the phone with unsteady hands, he dialed Squidward’s number.
To SpongeBob’s surprise the call was picked up almost immediately.
“SpongeBob!” Squidward shouted, his severe tone jolting the sponge even more from his drowsiness.
He knew he was in trouble but smiled, relieved that Squidward was alive.
“Good morning, Squidward!”
“Can you explain to me why I woke up this morning to a garbage bag stuffed full of Krabby Patties on my front porch, with a card reading ‘Get Well Soon’?”
Patrick…
SpongeBob bit his lip, twirling the telephone cord around his finger. “Heh.. no, I can’t explain that. How odd!”
“I don’t even know where these came from considering the Krusty Krab is closed on Sunday!”
“Wow, well, I guess it’s just another one of life’s many mysteries!”
“Whatever! Just do me a favor and get rid of them for me.”
“Can do, Squiddy! Be over soon.”
The call ended with an abrupt click as Squidward slammed the phone down.
In a hurry, SpongeBob pulled himself together and prepared for the day ahead. He felt strangely euphoric, even Patrick’s shenanigans didn’t seem to be successful in putting a damper on his mood. Maybe he was just delighted to know Squidward was still here, and grateful that there was still time.
Next door, Squidward found himself locked into a staring contest with a container of yogurt. He had every intention of eating it, as It was a meager ninety calories, within the acceptable range. But he needed to stall, he needed to hang onto that control for as long as he could, especially considering the possibility that it all might be ripped from him in the near future.
With hesitation, he rose from his chair. “Just do it, Squidward. Eat it. You’re a grown man!” he cried, slamming his tentacles on the kitchen table.
“Some men go to war and get their fins blown off. And here you are, In agony over a little low fat yogurt.”
Squidward tried to gain control over his breathing, slowing it substantially. With sheer willpower, he carefully peeled back the foil top.
Do it.. for SpongeBob.
He was aware that he should be doing this for himself, but without any rightly ordered self love to draw from, he needed a different motivator. Begrudgingly he lifted a spoonful to his mouth, allowing himself to take the first bite. It tasted bland, non-threatening at first, but every subsequent bite tasted like failure. It was hardly a significant amount of nourishment, but it felt like it had the power to bring his entire world crashing down. He internally scoffed at the thought, realizing it was quite the opposite. If he didn’t eat, then what little was left of his world would undeniably come to an end.
After finishing the yogurt, he flung the empty tub into the trash bin. Out of sight, out of mind, he figured. Instinctively he began to restlessly pace throughout his kitchen. He had built up the habit of trying to move continuously in an effort to stay in a calorie deficit. As he shuffled around aimlessly he became cognizant of his actions.
Oh stop it, already! Enough of this madness.. just sit down, Squidward.
As he grappled within himself for control, he started to wonder what control really was. So much time he had spent telling himself that he was simply achieving mastery over himself. The idea of being able to subjugate his own will at the drop of a hat often brought him satisfaction, but now something else was subjugating him, dissolving any and all gratification into nothingness.
As Squidward continued to speculate on his condition, a cheerful sponge was approaching his front door. SpongeBob stopped as he eyed the massive, grease slicked garbage bag. A soft sigh espaced his lips as he tried to take hold of it. It was heavy and slippery, but he managed to haul it back to Patrick’s rock. Without knocking he lifted the rock to find Patrick asleep. He didn’t say a word as tossed the bag, along with the greeting card, into starfish’s dwelling. He would deal with him later.
“Well, I should probably go check on Squidward now. I bet he wouldn’t mind some company!” SpongeBob said to himself.
Squidward’s pacing was cut short by the sound of the sponge’s knocking.
“Come in, SpongeBob!” he called out, still standing in his kitchen.
SpongeBob swung the door open, smiling from ear to ear as he greeted his neighbor.“Hi Squidward!”
Although secretly pleased at the sponge’s arrival, Squidward’s face remained fixed in its usual frown. “Hello, SpongeBob,” he replied, motioning for him to come in.
SpongeBob followed orders, and made his way to the kitchen to join him. “So, whatcha doiiin?” he asked, leaning up against Squidward playfully.
“I was just uhh.. eating breakfast,” he said, feeling embarrassment at the reminder that he was indeed a living creature who required sustenance.
“Really? You were?! That’s great Squidward!”
Squidward wasn’t lying, but it felt like it. He began rubbing the back of his neck to ease his slowly growing tension. “Heh, yeah,” he chuckled.
“So, what did you have?”
Squidward pinched the bridge of his nose. “Does it really matter?” he asked.
SpongeBob’s curious eyes traveled to the trash bin, noticing the empty yogurt container. “Is that all you ate?” he asked, sounding a little disheartened.
Squidward rolled his eyes as he sharply turned away from the sponge. “Why do you ask so many questions? Can’t you just be happy that I ate something?” he snapped.
“I’m sorry Squidward, you’re right! I’m really proud of you, okay? Ya know, for trying..”
Squidward returned his gaze to SpongeBob, feeling remorse at the harshness of his tone. “No, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it, sponge,” he said, offering a gentle pat on the head.
With ease, SpongeBob recovered from the tense interaction. He returned the affection with a warm hug. Although Squidward accepted the hug gladly, it caused him to stumble.
SpongeBob pulled away, but kept one hand gripped tightly to Squidward in order to steady him. “Woah! Are you feeling alright, Squidward?” he asked with concern.
Wanting to avoid causing alarm, Squidward pushed the sponge’s hand away. “Yes, I’m fine. Just.. still waking up is all.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes!” Squidward answered firmly.
SpongeBob and Squidward’s standards for what could be considered as “fine”, were likely very different. But considering that SpongeBob was faced with the time constraint of his fulfilling his pledge to Squidward, he would have no other choice than to trust in the cephalopod’s questionable self assessment.
“Well I hate to leave you so soon Squiddy. I just wanted to check in real quick and make sure you were alright, but I’ve really gotta go see Patrick. Are you okay to be alone right now?”
“Yeah SpongeBob, I’m fine. Go ahead,” he replied, motioning to the door causally.
“Okay Squidward, I’ll come by later. See you soon.”
SpongeBob hesitated, glancing back once before heading out the door. His footsteps were slow and reluctant as the door closed behind him.
Squidward was alone again, and it brought him no comfort. The previous night had been excruciatingly lonely for the cephalopod. Tossing and turning in the darkness, he argued with himself back and forth about whether or not he should wake up SpongeBob. He couldn’t be a burden anymore. Squidward knew that the sponge was getting tired, he could see it even behind that bubbly disposition.
Trying to shake off the unease, Squidward resumed his mindless pacing. Each step began to feel heavy, and a tingling sensation spread across his skin like wildfire. The room seemed to tilt, making his knees to buckle. With the last of his strength he clutched the kitchen counter, hoping to counter the delirium, but it was to no avail. The body that he had betrayed, was finally exacting its revenge. And In the blink of an eye, everything went black.
